first day blogging

Today is my first day blogging about my loss.  I will start with my history...I lost my baby boy 3 years ago on Oct. 12, 2007 due to a blood clot.  I previously had 2 healthy/normal pregnancies.  Carter Gordon Mitchell was born still at 36 weeks gestation.  I hadn't felt baby movement all day and went to the hospital at 9pm only to find out he no longer had a beating heart.  By 3am we had most of our families there and I went in for a repeat c-section.  I miss him so much and so do my other children.  We have gone on to have 2 more babies since we lost Carter and also had a miscarriage. Our last baby was born on Oct. 12 2010 and was a healthy baby boy.  He is our only living boy and he looks so much like Carter.  Since we have had Connor I miss Carter more then ever, I think it is partly because he resembles Carter so much and partly because he was our last baby and I don't feel like I have another pregnancy to look forward to.  I know another baby will never fill the void I have for Carter, but I also didn't expect to have it hurt so much again.  I will be able to post pictures of my baby angel soon, but I feel like I needed to vent my feelings and find a safe place to do it.